3 months...

Today is 3 months since my m/c. But I'm having a great day and a great weekend thanks to my amazing sister! We have been going and doing fun things, but mostly we've been having some awesome talks about life. I love that she has been open and so sympathetic toward me. She's allowed me to talk about my m/c in a way no one else has and it felt really good to have it acknowledged and to share about how it all felt. We had fun dreaming about the future and how one day we might have babies together or at least be able to have our kids play together and be excited about seeing one another.

We've been so busy playing and doing and having a blast hanging out! I've never done anything like this with my sister before and it's fantastic... I'm so sad it has to end.

Beautiful Weather & Scenery!

Syncope= passing out

I passed out at the dentist's today. They had just given me the numbing stuff and I was out. I think I really freaked them all out. They put oxygen on me and busted out the smelling salts. I think I was the big excitement for the day. Apparently people don't have "syncope" often at the dentists... go figure! They didn't even want to go on with the fillings but I convinced them to go ahead (I was already numb for goodness sake!) They made me wait in their waiting room for a while before driving home. Maybe I should have told them that passing out was a habit of mine. I've passed out getting my blood drawn, trying to donate blood, and at the oral surgeon's. I guess I didn't think a little numbing shot would make me pass out. I've been really tired lately and haven't eaten well or gotten much sleep so maybe that played a part.
Good news is my sister is coming tomorrow! Yeah!

Italy update: DH is meeting with the guy from church who is going to give him some tips of cool things to see at the Vatican!

Good times

I had a good weekend and have another one to look forward to! Just have to get through the days in-between.
Went to the orthopedic doctor on Friday... I broke my leg Feb '07, it never healed so I had surgery on it 9 months later... now it's all good, but I was having sharp pains through my leg for 6+weeks, so I went to see my ortho surgeon on Friday. (Murphy's Law= pain had stopped by then). Got another x-ray & things look perfect. Nice to know it's completely healed for sure. (Anyone have tips on making a nasty scar go away?)

We had the big festival at church this weekend... it was a blast & we got to meet some new people from our church. I learned that everyone knows DH's name, but not mine... I'm just the wife. That's okay, I really don't mind too much.

After church today, we hung out with another couple who have a 6-month old baby. It was a good time! I had moments when DH would be holding the baby & playing with him and I was just dreaming about what should have been... he'll really be a good dad.

Now I'm so incredibly excited about my sister coming next weekend! :)

"Sisters, Sisters, there were never such devoted sisters!"

My sister & I performed "Sisters" from White Christmas when we were in grade school. We wore identical poofy blue dresses and danced with white fans. We never really got along all that well back then. We never really connected until I was out of college. Now we are friends and I love it. But I hate that she lives over 19 hours away. I really miss having family nearby- especially her. She's never been out here to visit me (4 years) and now she's coming in a few weeks! I have so many ideas of things for us to do... another wonderful thing to look forward to!
Yeah for sisters!

It's in the water at work again...

Babies... 4 expected this year. One in September, two in November, and one in December. I'm only really excited for one- is that terrible? The one due in December is just telling people now because she had miscarried in the past, so I'm particularly happy for her. The one in September has complained about her pregnancy from day 1 and it has driven me crazy. One of the November babies is to a single mom and the other in November is due 2 days after my EDD, who also was not planned. I guess I shouldn't have the attitude that everyone should have to work so hard to have a baby, but I'm unjustly bitter at those who don't know the heartache of a miscarriage and get pregnant so stinkin' easily. (Yet I would never wish a pregnancy loss on anyone.) I suppose everyone has their own struggles in life. I'm just pretty upset that I found out about the baby due right after my EDD... I should be starting to show just like her and I'm not and I'm sad about that.

Excerpt from the book I just finished: "...that's the valley of the shadow of death, and God doesn't promise to take us around it. He promises He'll walk us through it." I thought that was quite profound. I guess the logic of it is similar to Footprints.

Italy planning update: DH contacted this guy at our church who's been to Rome multiple times and is setting us up with some awesome things to see and some private tours of St. Peter's that we might be able to get on! Yeah!

Italy!

DH & I have finally booked a trip to Europe! We've been talking about doing this ever since we got married. I'm so excited! It's so nice to have something to look forward to. Only downside is that we are definitely TTA for now... don't want to be pregnant for the trip (well, not too pregnant anyway). Time to go to AAA and get some travel books!

On another note... I'm wasting precious time trying to get the look of my blog just how I want it and can't manage to get it right... so it may be changing a lot in the near future!

Insomnia

Whoa did I have insomnia last night. Good thing I have today off work. My mind was going at full speed about babies and the future. Yesterday at church, the priest talked about the Catholic wedding vows. The third vow is to promise to accept children lovingly from God. I would just love to be able to do just that. We then met a beautiful family who just had their 6th child and talked about wanted to adopt also. It wasn't one of those families that had more kids than they could possibly care for. They were all loved and cared for. There was a 3 month old baby in the mix too. She was so beautiful. It just made me ache all over again for my lost baby. I should be almost 15 weeks pregnant right now.
I spent a lot of this time just praying that we will be blessed with another chance for a child... soon.