Emotional week

I'm not pregnant anymore. I started cramping and then bleeding on Thursday night. By Friday morning it was pretty AF... I haven't seen a doctor yet, but I'm just paying attention to make sure I don't bleed too much and have an appointment set up with primary doc on Tuesday. I don't even have an OB/GYN yet. I guess it's good that this happened so early- before we told anyone and before I had any doctor's appointments. It's still so hard and so sad. I went through all the emotions of finding out I was pregnant and getting worried and getting excited and then I miscarry. I was only in my 5th week. Happily and sadly, my sister in law had her baby on Thursday. So I'm surrounded by babies and excitement about pregnancies and I hate it right now. DH doesn't even have a clue. He thinks that maybe I wasn't even pregnant and just had a really long cycle and the multiple pregnancy tests that showed faint lines were just wrong. I don't want him to say that. I was pregnant and I lost the baby. That was my biggest fear. I have always been so terrified of miscarrying one day. My mom went through at least 3 that I know of and I saw how hard it was on her- I remember it being hard on me and I was only a kid. I'm looking forward to Tuesday to just make sure everything is okay. I don't know if she'll be able to tell at that point, but I kind of do want confirmation that I was in fact pregnant and that nothing's wrong with me and I will be able to have a baby someday.

It's positive?!

Whoa! So DH & I have been slacking on our NFP rules, have kind of gotten to the point of not trying, but not trying to prevent so much... We knew we were tempting fate when we did not wait for any temperature shift (even though I thought I was past the fertile mucus). I really didn't think I had gotten pregnant this cycle, but after 35 days pass... I tested... and got a very very faint line. Now I know FMU is best to use, but I was so stunned and unsure if I was seeing things, that I proceed with 5 more tests... some looking negative, but the majority with that very faint positive. I know that a line is a line... but I can't help but not really believe it until it's a more obvious positive. So, now I think I'm pregnant! Whoa!














4 of the HPT I took... all very faint +

I really don't have any symptoms... just have felt like AF is coming for the past week or so. Also, I've been getting really nauseated whenever I'm using any cleaning supplies. (My in-laws are coming to stay with us on Friday for who knows how long and I'm trying to clean the house like a mad woman).
On Saturday, we bought plane tickets for Thanksgiving. My EDD is the day before Thanksgiving. Great...

On Easter Sunday, we went to Mass at the Cathedral downtown. At the end of Mass, there was an older woman sitting behind us and asked us when we were going to have kids. She proceeded to ask us our names so she could pray for us to have kids. I think that woman has some kind of incredible pull with God! (That's how I told DH).