Told DH!

I told DH on Thursday after he got home from work. All day I was thinking of cutsie ways to tell him, like taking him back to the place he proposed (right outside of our church). Instead, DH was saying something about me eating healthy just in case I was pregnant and I made some comment to imply that I was and gave him "a look". (Obviously I don't really remember what was said). His face was perfect! He was so excited and came over and hugged me and kept telling me "Congratulations!" It was pretty darn cute.

I tested again Friday morning with a digital and left it for DH to see. His comment was "well, that sure takes out the guess-work". Anyway, so far I have no big symptoms other than feeling some mild cramping (just slightly different from AF cramps) and feeling gassy. DH keeps asking me if I feel sick yet.




I'm incredibly excited, but a bit nervous that I'm really excited. I don't want to be hurt by another m/c and I'm afraid that the more excited I get the worse it will hurt. But right now I have my baby, I love my baby, and I'm praying hard I'll get to keep my baby.

So Excited & So Scared!

I tested yesterday... BFN.

I tested today... BFP! It's faint, but it's pretty early still. I'm so incredibly happy and excited, but I'm so scared. I'm shaking still. I keep looking over at it to make sure it really is a BFP. It still is! :) This is definitely a different experience than my last BFP. I don't trust it yet, but I do. I don't know. I'm so emotional! It's been 17 months since I m/c. I've been hoping for so long for this! I'm so thankful for this awesome blessing in my life! I'm praying that I may be able to keep this baby and hold him/her in my arms.

Pretty sure it's positive!

Welcome to the world Evan!

Andrea had baby Evan yesterday! I'm so happy that she has her baby, healthy and safe in her arms. Congrats to her and husband Matt! Andrea has been such a huge support to me via the blogging world and I have loved following her story. She miscarried her first pregnancy at about the same point in her pregnancy as me, so I feel a special connection to her and she has given me so much hope.

Big Decision

Whoa... DH just presented me with a huge decision last night. Apparently, he's being offered a new job (in his same company) but this would require moving. Not to Europe... to small town Ohio. Neither of us have ever lived in a small town, only suburbs of big cities. He wants me to tell him if I'm up for it or not. It would be a good opportunity for him job-wise (he's always stressed and hates the job he's in now) and would be within driving distance of our families. But we would be leaving our house and the area that I've always imagined raising my kids. One of the biggest things I'd miss would be our church and all of the wonderful friendships we have made there. We are so blessed with such an amazing church and have both really grown in our faiths because of it. I know that the churches in the area we would be moving to in northern Ohio would be tiny and nothing like we have now. Maybe it's time to take a step of faith and do what's best for my husband and be close to family once again. I could actually start going back to visit my family more often. But we are so established where we are now and I love it here.

Obviously, I'm torn. DH wants to talk more about all of this tonight. I've been thinking and praying a lot about it and still don't know what I think.

What's on my mind

DH is traveling again... all week this time. I miss him.

I was really disappointed to have to miss another big family event... my nephew's baptism. But my sister just called to tell me they rescheduled it and I might be able to go! (If I can find good priced tickets). I really miss being able to stop by and celebrate life's joys with family. It always has to be such a process living so far away.

I haven't charted again this cycle. I kind of wish I would have. I have always charted to TTA, so am taking a break now that we are TTC. But it's killing me not being sure when exactly I ovulated. I certainly have an idea based on mucus, but I don't have my BBT to back it up. I hope we've hit our BD window, but am trying hard not to be confident in this cycle. I don't want to set myself up for disappointment. But I'm still praying.

Keeping busy

I've been keeping busy with work. DH has been doing the same. In addition to traveling a ton, he's working late nights and working while he's at home. I'm hoping to try to read more and watch less TV. My sister got me hooked on the Shopaholic books. I'm almost finished with the second one. I'm working out moderately, have cut out caffeine and am trying my best to eat healthy. I've gained enough weight to put me in the "normal" range for my BMI. I'm hoping that will help with my BFP chances. It's difficult to weigh more, but I'm going to need to fight that battle hard for the sake of a future child! It's worth it and I'm doing okay so far, but am a little frightened of pregnancy weight. I just need to stay healthy.
I'm holding out hope for this month despite DH's travels... a May baby would be just perfect! Praying that God agrees!

I don't want to be patient any more

AF showed. No more hope for an April baby. I'm even more upset because DH is traveling a ton this coming month and it's when I will probably o! I'm so frustrated that we could not have started trying a month earlier when we were both in town and this BD thing would have worked out much better. Maybe I would already be pregnant.
I know I need to be patient and realize this is in God's hands, but it stinks.

Nope...

BFN this morning. I'm stilling holding out a tiny bit of hope since my FMU was pretty diluted (I've been drinking tons of water lately). I also didn't get my last BFP until CD 30-something and today's only CD 27.
It's been tough to be patient these days.